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Jessicasbucketoffun
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Name: Jessica
Location: Lubbock
Birthday: 9/7/1985
Gender: Female
Interests: Dance, veterinarian medicine, unusual people, and unfortunately boys (this gets me into trouble).
Expertise: Religious conversations at 11:30 at night, working my "devil" cell phone, procrastinating, being different but not too much so.
Occupation: Student
Message: message meEmail: email me
Website: visit my website
AIM:  steelmagghia
Yahoo:  rajessaaron
Member Since:
11/9/2003
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| So everyone on my open diary has been doing this Jahori window thing where you describe yourself and then have others describe you and it maps out your traits and it looks like fun. So if any of you still read this, go here: http://kevan.org/johari?name=sexy+dixie+chicken and describe me!
~Jessi
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| Today was, to say the least, extremely emotional. To start...I've been
rather depressed for a couple of days and this morning mom and dad were
pissy. (side note: I now work at Dairy Queen...woo)
But some things happened that really kind of needed to. It started with
my flowers, through a bit of horsing around that didn't need to happen,
fell from my desk and a few of them broke. Now understand that these
are flowers that I've dried and preserved from various special
occasions/people. I cried...a lot...Talon felt super bad. But he fixed
what he could and I did my best to get over it
The flowers, though, sent both of us on a rather emotional path.
This
led us to a conversation about children. Background information: Talon
has wanted children his entire life.....very badly. I have specifically
NOT wanted children since I was six (for various reasons including I do
not want to mess up). Anyway. Talon and I were talking about children,
and I wanted to make sure that I had the choice not to have children,
because it's very important to me that if I DO have children, it was my
choice to do so. I don't want to bring an unwanted child into the world
you see. Talon, after a lot of thinking, told me that we wouldn't have
children. He was in tears while telling me this. I told him that I
didn't want to make the decision now, that I wasn't sure that I don't
want them or anything, I just want the choice. I think that was one of
the hardest things he's ever done. It was close to one of the hardest
for me to ask him.
I think, however, that I really understand exactly
how much he loves me now. I mean, he was prepared to basically give up
everything he's ever wanted to keep me from having to do the same. I
don't think I've ever known anyone who would do that for me. Not that I
WANT him to do it, mind you. But the idea that he would. That's....I
don't have a word for how amazingly....wow...that is. I just hope he
knows that I love him that much as well.;
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| Sarah Johnson's (now Price) wedding was yesterday. It was a good
wedding, though I felt insanely uncomfortable with the ceremony. I've
never seen a better sermon-slid-into-the-ceremony done by and preacher
before. Heh.
It was beautiful though. Becky Johnson (she's an LCU girly and Sarah's sister in law) was helping out. She's a nice girl.
Problems: I had nothing to eat the entire day with the exception of a
bagel that morning and five pretzels. I am hypoglycemic. I had a really
really bad attack. Had to be carried out to the car. It was great, let
me tell ya.
I may be going to Colorado to stay with my grandmother and attempt to
get a job there as no one seems t want to hire me here. This will make
for a VERY long summer away from my fiance. Murr. 
WEll, that's about it, and I need to get back to Father's Day. Ciao kids.
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| So I went shopping for shoes and had my dress
altered for Sarah's wedding. I also learned a very important lesson
today: Talon and I should not ever go to the mall together when I have
money. Heh
He had me try on this skitrt and shirt because he
thought I'd "look good" in them. And it was a very pretty outfit and I
liked it a lot. So I bought it of course. NO will power whatsoever. 
Today was a really good day actually. Though Mirah
called and wanted to do something now that Josh went back home. And I
was kind of annoyed with her for not calling and letting me know that
she was back in town so I could see her and Josh again. And I knew that
I would be tacky about it. SO I told her I was too tired.
Well...time for me to go. Love you kids! Ciao.
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| Talon
and I told Mom and Dad that we're engaged Saturday night. I didn't
think that they would take it well. And Dad took it okay. MOm....was
insanely depressed. She took it very badly.]
The
next day, a lot of drama. Lots of it. I ended up taking a long walk
and then walked to Talon's house. Mom was going completely insane,
making a scene in front of family, and whatnot. Dad eventually calmed
her down a bit and I came home.
Things are much
better now though. I think Mom finally realized that,
even though she thinks I'm making a huge mistake, I'm not getting
married until I graduate undergrad and if she doesn't push me, I will
change my mind if I feel I'm doing the wrong thing. If she pushes too
hard I will get married even if I do feel like I don't want to just to
spite her.Not that I'm going to change my mind, mind you. I think the
idea just puts her at ease a bit.
So now there
are some things that have changed, just because the
parentals think I need to be less coddled and know the real world a bit
(which is true). So Rach and I share a car now and have to pay for our
own gas (not insurance though). And we can't talk on the cell phones
when we're working. But that's about it. Which is fine with me.
Honestly, even if I wasn't engaged or anything, I'd think this was a
good idea
Tomorrow, Talon and I are going out to dinner with a
firend of his, Morgan Smith. She wants to meet me. Technically we went
to the same high school, but I don't really know her. I always thought
she was pretty though. This should be fun. 
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